So, like I mentioned in the intial, abbreviated post, the Steelers signed Max Starks to a new, four-year contract this afternoon.

The deal, which will keep Starks in black and gold until I'm at least 31, is reportedly worth $26.3 million, $10 million of which is guaranteed.

Like him or not, you can't really deny that Max Starks was a valuable commodity last season.

He may not have been pro bowl caliber, but when Marvel Smith remembered he had the back of a 78-year old, Starks was there to fill his shoes ably.

And most importantly, this puts some dollars back in the Steelers pocket - something they really needed.

Nevertheless, I'm sure there are some of you out there thinking that this is too much money, that they should have kept him around for the season and then let him go - in favor of someone unproven, that you have no idea how to get that tampon out of your butt - whatever the case may be.

Either way, at least now I can use my time to create even more ridiculous photoshops involving his huge ass...


Which is very clearly a WIN.

Tony Hills? Who knows.

Jason Capizzi? Who knows.

At least we have an idea of what we can expect from Max Starks.

Also, balls.

Sorry, that's all I've got today. It's been a rough offseason...

UPDATE: The reaction out of the Burgh...

Wow.

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