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Remember The Titans... E-mail
Written by Cotter   
September 17, 2010 00:00


Yeah, I did just use that as a headline. Sure, it's pretty weak; the kind of crap you'd expect from someone very literal, but frankly, I just wanted an excuse to use that beautiful piece of video as this post's featured media.

Anyway, as your eyes have undoubtedly been assaulted with several hundred times this week, the Steelers and Titans are no strangers. Our old AFC Central foes have become a regular opponent, even if we don't play them twice a season anymore.

The last time we met was the first game of last season. The game in which Troy both made the worlds sickets interception and suffered a knee injury that probably affected the entire Steelers 2009 season.

In that game, the Steelers barely scraped one out against Titans at Heinz Field, having to rely on an overtime Jeff Reed field goal to eke out a 13-10 opening day victory.

jeffreedtitans

No idea who number 50 in white is.

The Titans, of course, were starting Kerry Collins' old ass, who had to try and do what he could with his arm to counteract the effect of the Steelers run defense, which held the inimitable Chris Johnson to just 57 yards on 15 carries.

Actually, both ground attacks were pretty much useless in that game, as "Fast" Willie Parker had only 19 yards on 13 carries, and Big Ben ended up throwing the ball 43 times.

But whatever. That was then; this is now.

Now, a year and a week later, the Steelers are headed down to the intersection of Titans Way and Blow Me Avenue...
titansstreetsign

Vince Young is the Titan's QB, Dennis Dixon is the Steelers QB, and both teams are 1-0.

Last week, the Titans put a spanking on the Raiders to open their 2010-2011 season, whipping them 38-13. This, of course, being the most lopsided game of a weekend chockful of games tighter than Glenn Beck's asshole, may make the Titans seem like more of a threat than they really are. The Raiders, for all their "improvements" were still 29th against the run last year, and facing a team that had the league's #1 rusher and #2 running game last year probably wasn't the best matchup for them. As a result, Chris Johnson danced around the Raiders defense on 27 carries for 142 yards and 2 TDs, although 76 of those 142 yards and one of those TDs came on one run late in the 1st half. Other than that, Vince Young currently has the best QB rating in the NFL after completing 13 of just 17 pass attempts for 154 yards and 2 TDs, reinforcing the fact that QB rating is more useless than Carey Davis.

Coincidentally, Dennis Dixon scratches his nuts with 154 yards passing, so take that for whatever it's worth.

In any case, like I said, the Steelers defense isn't taking any crap this year from opposing running backs, so if all goes to plan, they contain Chris Johnson and make Vince Young try and beat them with his arm. Not that it matters, but for his career, VY has only thrown the ball more than 25 times in 16 out of 42 career starts (that's over the past four years plus the one game already this year). Not that he's done all that badly when he has, but the point is - Vince hasn't started a game Chris Johnson didn't play in (and rush for more than 100 yards in) since Week 1 of 2008.

So, I guess what I'm saying is...
drunkymcdrunkerson
 
Good luck, you sloppy bitch.

Of course, I'm not saying I don't think Vince Young could play well; I'm sure that's a legit possibility. But it's way more entertaining and appropriate to hate on him. After all, this is the internet.

So, I've rambled about nothing long enough, it's time to jump into this mess. Without further do-do, I present to you the 2010 Titans.

Don't forget to make your predictions in the comments.

Over/under on number of dirty hits for Hines Ward is 12.

Wooo!

Quarterbacks:
vinceyoung

[Thanks, Deadspin!]

"You have to be very patient and take what they give you, until something breaks. I have a lot of respect for them. This is my first time and I'm definitely looking forward to it because you always want to test yourself against the best."

- Vince Young

Quick, what do Vince Young and Limas Sweed have in common?

Nope, not the University of Texas, I'm talking about emotional scarring.

Amazing that just two years after randomly DISAPPEARING reportedly because he got boo'd, Vince Young now finds himself holding the reins to Tennessee's offense...sort of.

The way I see it, once a headcase, always a headcase.

Over the last four years, Young has never once faced the Steelers, if you can believe that (both of the past two times it's been Kerry Collins). Some still worry about him making plays with his legs, but frankly, he knows he's facing the Steelers. If Chris Johnson ain't running on 'em, he ain't either.

His final numbers will probably look something like this...
vycrying

Running Backs:
cjlazyriver

Chris Johnson has rushed for 100 yards or more in 12 consecutive games.

Unforunately, he won't live to see 13...I mean, he won't get to enjoy 13.

What, you want some type of drawn out analysis on Chris Johnson?

If you don't know how deadly he can be, I hear figure skating could use some new fans.

Oh right, Javon Ringer, yadda yadda, 5-10 carries a game.

Wide Receivers:
natewashingtonauntjemima

Nate Washington, Justin Gage, Kenny Britt, and some dudes who probably won't get thrown to (also known as Marc Mariani, Lavelle Hawkins and Damian Williams).

So, you've probably never heard of Nate Washington, but he led the Titans last week against the Raiders with 3 catches for 88 yards, including a 56 yarder for a score. I'd be worried about Nate Dogg, but frankly, I'm pretty sure Ike Taylor knows how to cover him.

Kenny Britt was the dude who the Titans drafted in the 1st round last year out of Rutgers and who may or may not have dressed last week - according to the box score, he did not. 

For that matter, the only reason I know Justin Gage played was because they threw to him once, though he didn't make the grab.

Oddly enough, it was Britt and Gage who showed up last time we played the Titans, with Britt catching 4 balls for 85 yards and Gage catching 7 for 78 and a score, but I guess Vince Young just doesn't have much of a connection with either of them. Like Mark Sanchez, he'd much rather check it down to Chris Johnson or use his old college buddy Bo Scaife or some other TE as a crutch.

Still not even sure why I'm previewing Wide Receivers when none of them are going to catch a pass on Sunday.

Woooooo!

Tight Ends:
troyonboscaife

Get used to it, Bo.

Forget TEs. There are some. They'll catch at least half of Vince Young's balls.

The other half he'll save for his boyfriend.

Are we done yet?

Offensive Line:
vyswieners

Left to right - Michael Roos, Leroy Harris, Eugene Amano, Jake Scott, David Stewart.

Michael Roos was born in Estonia and is 6'7" 320 pounds of homo sapien, Leroy Harris needs to up his Wikipedia game, Eugene Amano is the second Filipino-born player to play in the NFL, Jake Scott is from Idaho and played for Tom Cable after walking on to the team at University of Idaho, David Stewart has started 46 consecutive games at RT for the Titans, and somehow they're all under 30.

As a unit they gave up only 15 sacks all last season - 9 on VY, 6 on Old Balls McGee (I kid because I love you, Kerry) - although they did give up 2 last week to the Raiders.

What a terrible line.

The Steelers pass rush should feast...errr, something.

Defensive Line:
50deal

I'm obviously going for maximum animated GIFs today, in case you couldn't tell.

Left to right again - Jason Babin, Jason Jones, Tony Brown, Jacob Ford/David Ball depending on who you ask (ESPN - Ford, Titans official website - Ball).

Remember when the Titans D-line used to be Albert Haynesworth, Kyle Vandenbosh and/or Jevon Kearse, and possibly some other human being?

No idea who any of those dudes I listed above are, except Jason Jones, just being honest.

Babin and Jones each got their hands on Jason Campbell once last week, contributing half of the Titans 4 sacks.

Tony Brown/David Ball and Jacob Ford? Ford is 6'4" but only 252 pounds - pretty sure Big Ben's chunkier than that - but he did force a fumble last week, and led the Titans in sacks in '09 with 5.5. Ball is slightly larger at 6'5" 255, and one of his sports heros is Bo Jackson, and I gotta respect that. And Tony Brown had 5 sacks last year despite relative anonymity (2nd on the team behind Ford), which I consider pretty solid for a 4-3 D tackle. Just be sure you don't confuse him with Tony Brown, the British darts player.

I'm sure Maurkice Pouncey won't.

Linebackers:
wowpsu

Will Witherspoon - has had his last two seasons cut short by injuries and his last really solid season was 2007, which was also the best season of his career. He had 1 of the Titans 4 sacks last week, though, so you never know what a change of scenery can do for a guy.  

Stephen Tulloch - had 121 tackles last season, which led all Titans. I got nothing else. You?

Jamie Winbourn - had a 99 tackle season in '08, which probably got him signed with the Titans in '09, though he only played two games last season, and hasn't had more than 1/2 a sack for five years now (though he's only actually played one full season in 9 years in the league). Verdict - whatevs. 

And for any of you wondering where Steelers 2008 rookie of the year Patrick Bailey went, it was the Titans. He'll be there too.

Can you tell I'm over this already?

Sorry, I'm trying here.

Defensive Backs:
hines

So, if the Titans have one area full of studs, it's probably the secondary.

We're looking at the 6th Dirtiest Player in the NFL (and aspiring dirtiest), Cortland Finnegan at one corner, and something called Jason McCourty at the other.

Then, our old friend Chris Hope at Free Safety, and another Texas Longhorn, Michael Griffin at Strong Safety.

Hope, Griffin and Finnegan were all among the top six Titans in tackles last season. Chris Hope had 3 picks in '09 and Finnegan had 5 - Griffin only had 1.

Numbers, numbers, blah blah blah, stuff.

I'm just going to ignore Jason McCourty because he's not even important enough to have his picture up on ESPN.com. You know who does have his picture up, though? Sean Mahan.

Enough said.

Head Coach:
jefffisherdungy

Surprise, I'm still friggin' here!

Jeff Fisher probably has the best job security in the NFL. It's not like the Titans have ever really had a lot of terrible seasons - though '04 and '05 were a little rough for them, but he's still the longest tenured current head coach (with one team, of course). The guy has been with the organization so long that he even coached the team for two years when they were still the Houston Oilers.

Plus, you gotta hand it to him for always having a pretty solid 'stache.

I'd probably hate him a lot more if he was Brian Billick, but I suppose that goes without saying.

Here comes the random YouTube section.

No commentary necessary...









If you didn't listen to Arrested Development, a piece of your life is missing.

Don't worry, I didn't read most of this thing either.

Here we go!

If you haven't already, become a fan of OFTOT on Facebook and follow Cotter on Twitter. Or don't. Your choice, really.



 

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