![[Unnamed] Steelers Pregame Show](/images/stories/menu33.png)
Great recap. I thought I mistook Tirico calling Reed "Josh". Glad to know my hearing isn't completely gone. We're rolling; I don't see the Bengals getting close.
| Time To Make Like Ringo... |
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| Written by Captain Planet |
| November 10, 2009 23:12 |
 "I like to smell the flowers. I think often we appreciate the end result of our work. I appreciate just getting to do the work." - Mike Tomlin With all of the dime-store jokes and bush league metaphors we've been proliferating around here, one thing we feel we've been missing is a meaningful appreciation of what the Steelers are doing this season. As we watched last night's game, we almost felt like we were watching men grow before our eyes (that's what she said...sorry, we couldn't resist). The confidence Ben exuded was palpable. Of all of the ways to open up the 2nd half, the last thing any Steeler fan wanted to see was a 50 yard, three and a half minute drive go down the drain in a matter of seconds. But that didn't matter to Ben. Instead of pouting like a little girl, he went over to the sidelines, consoled Chris Kemoeatu (who WAS pouting like a little girl), and waited for his next chance. And moments later, when that chance came, he calmly trotted out onto the field and drove the Steelers 80 yards in two minutes, metaphorically waving his middle finger at everyone wearing creamsicle orange at Invesco Field. And how about Rashard Mendenhall? 22 carries for 155 yards, including runs of 18, 24, 28, and 36 yards. Not to mention a significant number of 4-8 yard runs. When you've got a running game like that to go with Big Ben's arm, you're going to be tough to stop. Then you've got Mike Wallace. The kid has only played half a season's worth of pro football, but you'd never know it. Overall this season, he's got 25 catches for 437 yards, and he's the only rookie to even crack the top 40 in terms of receiving yards. If you look at receivers who have caught 25 or more balls, his 17.5 yard average ranks him 3rd behind only Miles Austin (who's been playing with Tony Romo for something like four years now) and Desean Jackson. Hell, he's only got one less touchdown than Hines and Heath (and two more than Super Bowl MVP Santonio Holmes). Somewhere right now, Nate Washington is in a dark room, watching film of Mike Wallace and crying. Oh, and the Offensive Line! These guys are playing out of their minds this season. Ben's still getting sacked. That's never going to end. But a lot of those sacks are coverage sacks (we saw at least one last night) or Ben jus trying to make a play, and you have to stand up and applaud the fact that on some plays, Ben could pretty much take a nap in the backfield. Watching Max Starks swat away Elvis Dumervil last night was one of the most satisfying and underrated moments of that game. And that just covers one side of the ball. But enough of this sentimental shit. This isn't a Barbara Walters interview. Let's properly celebrate the "Things That Were Awesome," "Things That Were Not Awesome," and "Things That Sucked Worse Than Coors Light." If you feel so inclined, feel free to join us with your own in the comments.
Things That Were Awesome:
After last night's performance, Ben has become the media's new favorite Quarterback. Some have been so bold as to say it was his "coming-out party."
So you can imagine the joy we had while watching TC waddle his Ninja Turtle body, all the way in for six.
Hey Correll, if you're reading this, can you please send us your address?
We found several of your teeth halfway across the country here that we'd like to return to you.
Yeah, the Broncos are a physical team.
Please.
If you believe that, you probably still wear pajamas with feet on them.
Like Correll Buckhalter.
A word of advice, CB, next time the train's coming, get off the tracks.
That'll be $100,000 for saving your life.
5. Steeler Nation
Let's just not.
2. Kyle Orton
No, he's not.
But coming up with things that weren't awesome after a game like that is a fool's errand.
We refuse to indulge.
What a colossal douchebag.
We hate to blame officiating, but...
If he wasn't wearing a John Elway jersey, we'd think this ham sandwich was an extra from the movie, Braveheart.
Only, in the movie Braveheart, they didn't use fruit-loop-orange-colored facepaint.
We've never understood the face painting phenomenon.
Maybe it's because our faces are scary enough without it.
Maybe it's because we're not complete toolsheds (debatable).
Either way, we'd like to think that if the Russians were to start picking off Americans from outer space, this asshole would be among the first to go.
Darwinism isn't just a myth, you know.
Heads better roll for this one. The Steelers and the Yankees are about as similar as China and Montana.
If the Steinbrenners were half the human beings the Rooneys are, they'd have sunk some cash into this garbage economy so people could get jobs and afford seats at their new stadium.
But why do that when you can fist people with the price of a beer and some chicken fingers?
Yankee Stadium goers will be paying for CC Sabathia for the next 80 years.
Enjoy that.
Other Things That Are Only Marginally Related:
1. We've received a memo. It reads, "you can shut up about running the ball more." 2. Nate Washington is a poor man's Mike Wallace. 3. We missed one glaring stat last night...namely, # of times the Broncos were in the red zone = 0 4. So you're a Browns fan, huh? How's that going? 5. Someone call Mike Tirico and remind him that the Steelers kicker is JEFF Reed.
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